Ha ha !

Yesterday I had a flat tire on the interstate. So I ease my car over to the shoulder of the road, carefully, get out of the car and open the trunk. I took out 2 cardboard men, unfolded them and stood them at the rear of my car facing oncoming traffic. They look so life like you would not believe it! They are in trench coats exposing their nude bodies to the approaching drivers. To my surprise, cars start slowing down looking at my life like men. And of course, traffic starts backing up. Everybody is tooting their horns and waving like crazy. It was not long before a state trooper pulls up behind me. He gets out of his car and starts walking toward me. I could tell he was not a happy camper! What is going on here? My car has a flat tire, I said calmly. Well, what are those obscene cardboard men doing here by the road? I could not believe that he did not know. So I told him, Hellooooo, those are my emergency flashers!

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I have missed you,and I do hope you will soon have good health again.I will remember you in my prayers.

Thank you for thoughts and prayers. I am geetting stronger but as one gets older every illness takes more of a toll. LOL.

I must have tried to post a joke, but it did not record. Sorry. I shall try later.

That is fine ole friend.

I hope life isn't a big joke,because I don't get it.

You will get it once the punch line hits you where your sensitivites are

Hey zaphod,good to hear from you,I thought that might bring you out.

Thank you Claudine: Nice of youn to remember me. I have been quite ill for a while and you might have noticed that I did not play SC. I am now about 1 week slowly recuperating and soon I shall be back on forum regularly. As you know I don't read the daily chat. LOL

You are not old until your regrets take the place of your dreams.

You are not old until your regrets take the place of your dreams.

Sorry,I posted twice.

@claudine: Thank you for your wise words. I am a bit puzzled though! I never had regrets for anything in the past, although I always learned from my mistakes. Neither have I fear of the future, as I believe that if I survived well so far, there is no reason not to feel confident that whatever comes I shall be able to handle. YET! I still feel old. Go figure! In a different vein: What did DELAWARE to GEORGIA's party in MICHIGAN? She wore a NEW YERSEY that VIRGINIA bought in MARYLAND, Did you see when TENNESSEE did see a saw in ARKANSAS, For this silly song of States IOWA big apology!

A couple engages a maid who just arrived from Mexico a few weeks ago. After about a month she suddenly announces that she is quitting. The wife asks her why she is quitting, and she reponds because I am in the family way. The wife is schocked and asked who is the other party. and the maid says: "Your husband and your son!" When asked furter to explain how did it happen, the maid responds: "I go into the Library to clean and your husband says I am in his way. I go into the Living Room and your son says I am in his way. So I am in the family way and I quit!"

That was a good one.

Which one ws good, the maid or the song about Tennessee?

US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal immigrant in the bushes right by the border fence in Texas, he pulls him out and says "Sorry, you know the law, you've got to go back across the border right now." The Mexican man pleads with them, "No, noooo Senior, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!" The Border Patrol Agent thinks to himself, I'm going to make it hard for him and says "Ok, I'll let you stay if you can use 3 english words in a sentence." The Mexican, of course, agrees. The Border Patrol Agent tells him, "The 3 words are Green, Pink and Yellow.......Now use all them in 1 sentence." The Mexican man thinks really hard for about 2 minutes, then says, "Hmmm, Ok...... The phone, it went Green, Green, Green, I Pink it up and sez Yellow?"