And what does the wife say?
Who do you think was furious? Now I shall give you a better one and again changing the topic; Student says to the University Professor: "I dont think I deserve an 0!" The professor replies; " I dont think so either, but that was the lowest mark I am allowed to give!"
Well, that one was right on the mark!
Mother: How do you like your new teacher? Son: I dont. She told me to sit up front for the present and then she did not give me one!
Son: I cannot go to school today. Father: Why not? Son: I dont feel well Father: Where dont you feel well? Son: In school!
Teacher: You missed school yesterday didnt you? Pupil: Not very much!
A guy needed a horse, so he went to a temple and got one. Before he left, the priest told him that it was a special horse. In order for it to go, he would say
An employee went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall. She showed him the instructions on the tin,
While visiting a country school, the chairman of the Board Of Education became provoked at the noise the unruly students were making in the next room. Angrily, he opened the door and grabbed one of the taller boys who seemed to be doing most of the talking. He dragged the boy to the next room and stood him in the corner. A few minutes later, a small boy stuck his head in the room and pleaded,
A police officer found a perfect hiding place for watching for speeding motorists. One day, the officer was amazed when everyone was under the speed limit, so he investigated and found the problem. A 10 year old boy was standing on the side of the road with a huge hand painted sign which said
Hi @Denise, glad to hear from you! These jokes are hilarious!!
The following text messages were exchanged on a cold winters day. Wife:
Little Emma returned from the birthday party and her mother asked:
A Rock Hudson -- a putt that looked straight, but wasnt A Saddam Hussein -- from one bunker into another A Yasser Arafat -- butt ugly and in the sand A John Kennedy Jr. -- didnt quite make it over the water A Rodney King -- over-clubbed An O.J. -- got away with one A Princess Grace -- should have used a driver A Princess Di -- should not have used the drive A Brazilian -- shaved the hole A Rush Limbaugh -- Way to the right but still in bounds A Nancy Pelosi-- Way to the left and out of bounds A James Joyce-- a putt thats impossible to read A Ted Kennedy-- goes in the water and jumps out A Pee Wee Herman&-- too much wrist A Sonny Bono -- straight into the trees A Mickey Mantle -- a dead Yank These are new golf terms.
@zaphod, I see you are at 141 for the game today!! Good for you. I am working on trying to find that last path to 138, although when @Layla plays it will probably go lower.
Hey Rachel, yes, they are hilarious!! Harleyman, the Ipod one was tooooooo funny!
That one about the horse was a cliffhanger....
..the other one was a gas... I gasped for air over that one. Was it rap music you were listening to ? I'm sure glad you didn't decide to play it backwards... I think rap music would sound the same whether you played it backwards or not.
I'll bet you the one about the windows being frozen was a real pain...